Hey, did you know that learning about what works and what doesn’t work in blogging is a great way to polish your dating skills, too? It’s true! At its core, creating a successful blog is about communicating well, connecting with your audience, and putting on your best face . . . each of which are great romantic ideas for improving your personal relationships, as well.
So does this mean that the most successful bloggers have the best relationships, too? I don’t know the answer to that, but it sure seems that Darren Rowse, Alister Cameron, John Chow and Dan and Jennifer do a great job of injecting the same creativity, passion and intensity into their relationships as they do into their ultra-successful blogs. Having a great blog may not guarantee that you’l have a great dating life or marriage, but following the same secrets of success will certainly put you on the right track.
Luckily, you don’t have to start your own blog to learn what those secrets are. The top ten are listed below, tested and refined by millions of bloggers across the globe.Whether you use them to improve your dating life or your blog is up to you. Just remember: you can’t kiss a computer screen!
Top Ten Reasons why Blogging is Like Dating
1. First impressions are everything.
Sure, you may have plenty of useful, exciting stuff to offer someone, but they’ll never get a chance to find out if you don’t set the stage with a great first impression.
In dating, that’s done by taking good care of your physical appearance, having a positive attitude, and showing interest in your date. In blogging, you need a clean, professional design, easily-accessible and interesting content, and a readily-defined subject so your visitors know what you’re about right away.
2. You should never pretend to be someone you aren’t.
Playing a role and acting like you’re someone else may get you somewhere in the short run, but if you aren’t the person you’re pretending to be, you’re going to get found out eventually. If you’re trying to fool your date into thinking you’re an expert on a topic you have no passion for, they’re going to figure your out sooner or later.
The same goes for blogging. Blog about what you enjoy, not what your think will bring you money and fame.
3. Finding the one for you can take time.
What are the chances that your very first date will lead you into the arms of your perfect match? Close to zero. That special someone may be out there, but you may have to search for a long time to find them. Just because you’ve suffered from a string of bad dates, you shouldn’t give up hope and stop trying.
Similarly, just because you’ve had some failures with different blogs doesn’t mean you should turn off the computer and quit. Finding your niche in the blogging world can take time, too. Your failures are giving you more experience, and that next blog just might be the one that takes off for you.
4. A bad reputation can ruin your chances.
Deserved or not, a bad reputation can sabotage an opportunity to start a relationship with an interesting new person. Sure, it’s possible to put your past behind you and become a better, more appealing person, but overcoming a bad reputation can take a long time and a lot of hard work. “Oh, I’ve heard of you” is never something you want to hear on a first date.
In the blogosphere, a bad reputation can be earned just as easily. Whether it’s through rude comments on other blogs or sloppy and unprofessional writing on your own, a bad blogging reputation can follow you around for years. Remember: everything you ever post online is going to be there for everyone to see for a long, long time!
5. Good communication is essential.
If you can’t communicate to your date about who you are, your passions and your dreams, it will probably end up being a pretty short evening. Creating a great romantic relationship is all about communicating, getting to know each other, and learning about what makes each other tick. Having a pretty face is fine, but without communication skills, you’re probably going to face a string of lousy relationships.
Communication is just as important, if not moreso, in blogging. You can distract a new visitor with flashy aesthetic stuff for a few minutes, but unless you’re able to effectively communicate to them about why your blog is worth visiting again, they won’t be back. And you might have great ideas for posts, but if you can’t write or edit worth a darn, who’s going to want to trudge through them?
6. You should concentrate on what you have in common.
Having things in common with your significant other is essential in maintaining a successful romantic relationship, and the old adage about “opposites attract” is hogwash. One of the best ways to capture your date’s interest and guarantee a second date is by discovering what you have in common. If you discover that you just don’t have any mutual interests or experiences, it’s probably a good sign that you just won’t work out.
Having things in common with your blog’s visitors is every bit as essential if you want to build a loyal readership. If you find yourself starting to post on things that have nothing to do with your readers’ interests, it may be time to close up shop and start another blog with a new subject.
7. “Playing the field” can get you into big trouble.
There are plenty of people who do just fine with juggling several shallow, uncommitted relationships at once, but that sort of lifestyle will never let them reap the benefits of a loving, monogamous relationship. Having multiple relationships at once will make you less emotionally satisfied, less financially secure, and more at risk for a long list of unappetizing hazards.
And the exact same can be said for blogging! There are a few examples of people who have found success by starting a dozen blogs at once, but most people who try that just end up with twelve crappy blogs. It’s better to concentrate your efforts on one blog, building its readership and then branching out into other similar niches when you’ve found success with your flagship.
8. There’s nothing more attractive than self-confidence.
Arrogance is never an attractive quality, but a healthy amount of self-confidence is extremely appealing on a first date. Showing confidence in your abilities, lifestyle and unique qualities makes other people more excited about learning about you, and a confident, upbeat person is just plain fun to be around.
Showing self-confidence in your blog posts is a great way to build reader loyalty and trust. Never second-guess yourself, put your own blog down or back down in the face of inevitable criticism. Instead, present your content as professionally, confidently and optimistically as possible.
9. You’ll improve your chances for success if you make sure things are right in your life first.
Let’s put it bluntly: if you’re having serious problems with your family, career or mindset in your own life, it’s not the right time to try to find a person to share that life with you. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t allow yourself to get to know interesting new people until everything in your life is perfect. I am saying that concentrating on building a successful career, a successful relationship with your friends and family, and a optimistic outlook on life will help out your dating life immensely.
If you’re thinking of starting up a blog, make sure you’re in a position in your life to take on the responsibility. First and foremost, never assume it will be a replacement for your career. The livelihood that supports your family will always be more important than your hobbies, but plenty of bloggers have let their addiction to the blogosphere negatively affect their performance at work.
10. Learning to love yourself makes it easier for others to love you.
That good old cliche about “love thyself” is some of the best advice you can get to build a better, more loving relationship. Feeling good about yourself, and being proud of the things you do, is a great way to learn to concentrate on your best qualities and share them with those around you.
You may enjoy blogging, but have you truly learned to love your blog? Do you feel good about its unique qualities? Can you look through the eyes of your loyal visitors and see what they enjoy about it? Being critical of ourselves and our projects is good to a certain degree, but make sure you allow yourself to be proud of your blog’s best qualities. Learning to love your blog will let you offer your readers more of what makes it truly great!
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